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Writer's pictureSue Leonard

How I Survived Automatic Toilets, Cheetos Stains, and Yacht Rock

Automatic toilets have a mind of their own, and I learned that the hard way when an automatic toilet gave me an unplanned splashdown. I thought I’d sat on Old Faithful, except the water was cold.


Woman's feet in slippers on toilet

Yuk. I tried not to move so I wouldn’t trigger the sensor, but it didn’t work. It flushed again. And again. Four times in total. It soaked the tissue toilet seat cover I was using for protection. A lot of good that did. I felt like I needed to bathe in Clorox to remove any germs.  


The next day I Googled what causes rogue flushes and how to prevent them. Turns out you can cover the sensor with toilet paper before you sit and remove it when you leave. WikiHow has a step-by-step guide with pictures (1). That’s good because I wouldn’t have a clue where the sensor is. Putting toilet paper over the sensor every time you use a public restroom seems like a pain, but I guess it beats getting soaked by unwanted flushes.


One expert gave a technical dissertation on why this happens. Since the sensor works with infrared light and gets fooled into thinking you’ve left if you wear dark, textured fabrics.  I was wearing brown.  It also senses distance, so if you lean over it thinks you’ve left.

So this explains my accidental drenching.  I had on dark clothing I leaned over to reach for the toilet paper and woosh – the toilet flushes. Since I had a hard time finding the end of the toilet paper, I must have kept leaning and triggering the flusher.


Lesson learned. Wear light clothes and don’t lean over if you use public toilets – or cover the sensor with toilet paper.


Then there was the Cheetos debacle.  I ate a snack bag and my fingernails turned orange. I’ve tried scrubbing. I even scrubbed the nail polish off, thinking the Cheetos dyed the nail polish. That helped but a month later they still have a yellowish tinge.

When I showed my fingernails to my sister she chuckled and said, “That’s why my friend gave the kids at daycare Cheetos on toothpicks.  So it looks like I should start using toothpicks when I eat Cheetos.


Cheeto stained fingernails
Cheeto-stained fingernails after a month of scrubbing

In my Googling, I stumbled upon a study about the food dye in Cheetos. It can make mouse skin temporarily transparent. Scientists think this could help doctors study internal organs without surgery. No harm to the mice, they say, but it does make you wonder about eating the stuff. (2) To ensure the study wasn’t a joke I checked to see if it was written on April Fool's Day. It wasn't.


A quick search about Cheetos and their staining powers opened the door to surprising discoveries. For example, someone who wanted to use natural dyes to dye a piece of fabric asked if he could use Cheetos.  I’m not sure I would call Cheetos natural, but people responded that Cheetos couldn’t be used because the dye is water soluble. Oh yeah. Then why are my fingernails still faintly orange after a month of multiple hand washings a day?


The craziest posting was a young man, “Dying my hair with flaming hot Cheetos. “ He crunches the Cheetos and smears them on his hair. The results are terrible. I cringe at all the young people like him doing crazy things to try to be influencers. He has over 700,000 followers.  I have 35 followers. Maybe I should dye my hair with Cheetos.


One of my favorite commercials is the Cheetos commercial where the father uses a blacklight to scan his family to see who has been eating the Cheetos. His wife and kids have the tell-tale orange dye on their faces. Then you hear a meow and a cat is sitting on the floor with orange dye on her face and a trail of Cheetos behind her. The dad says, “When did we get a cat?” 


Cat in Cheetos Commercial

Cats love Cheetos. My vet once had a cat that snuck into a Cheetos bag. His face stayed orange for months.  If you are bored one day, search for  “Animals Eating Cheetos” on YouTube and you’ll see cats, dogs, seagulls, raccoons, monkeys, hedgehogs, goats, and squirrels. I guess they like them as much as we do.


Finally, on Friday night we attended a Yacht Rock concert. My friend and I had never heard of Yacht Rock. According to Wikipedia, Yacht Rock is soft rock from the mid-1970s to the mid-1980s. The term Yacht Rock was coined in 2005 by the makers of the online video series Yacht Rock and is associated with boating.  Some examples of Yacht Rock artists include Paul Simon, Hall & Oates, Fleetwood Mac, and America. For yuks, I looked at the Wikipedia entries for Fleetwood Hall & Oats, Fleetwood Mac, and America and none of them listed Yacht Rock as the genre. No wonder didn’t know the term. 


Yacht Rock Group performing at First Presbyterian Church, Bonita Springs
Yacht Rock pic from Shirley Curtis

So, what’s the lesson here? Public restrooms are booby-trapped, Cheetos are out to get us, and apparently, Yacht Rock is something we’ve been enjoying for decades without knowing it had a name. Life’s full of these little surprises. At least it all makes for good stories—and maybe a reason to keep a packet of sanitizing wipes and a bag of toothpicks handy.


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